Monday, February 17


It's one of those days where you absolutely feel you are useless, unwanted, chucked away like an old toy. Am I being neglected, or is it just me? I feel discarded, and totally without value. Perhaps it's just my feelings combined with a lot of external factors, like today. I don't about the others, but I don't feel like part of the family. I thought I did, until later when finally the realisation hit me. I was not needed. And definitely just someone you can do without. Loneliness creeps in and the effect worsens. Oh no. What's happening to me? Can't I just survive without needing to care about what others think or feel about me? Am I that vulnerable to criticism? What's happened to the old me?

Why?

Posting past blogs.

12th February 2003

Just went on net to surf for my horoscope and found these. Thought these were quite accurate, so decided to post it here.

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Your sign is that of sensitive Cancer, the fourth sign of the zodiac, the sign characterized by deep feelings and protectiveness. You are known for being nurturing, hospitable, and imaginative, and all your effort goes into making your home a safe place for you and the people you cherish.

The Moon, is the ruler of your sign, and makes you a very intuitive and empathetic person. Like the ebb and flow of the tides, you are both receptive to those you love and willing to offer comfort in return.

Being the first of the water signs you have psychic powers, and are able to sense feelings and thoughts in others - you feel rather than think. When you love someone, you love truly and deeply, and have the desire to connect on a profound level.

As a Cancer, you rule the fourth house, the sector of the horoscope that describes your emotional roots, your home, your childhood, and your parent of lesser influence, usually your father. Most of all, the fourth house stands for attunement to your inner self.

Your sign is a cardinal sign, which means that your parental instincts compel you to protect and fight for the security of your loved ones. You thrive on drama, and get stronger in situations of crisis.

Your strengths lie in your ability to adapt and cooperate, and your wonderful way of providing comfort. You are devoted and selfless in your dealings with others, which makes you a very dependable person. Since you are attuned to your unconscious, you have a strong imagination and are in touch with your intuition.

One of your weaknesses is that you can get hypersensitive and moody when someone fails to show you their love and appreciation. In situations of insecurity, you sometimes show immature, manipulative, and even tyrannical behavior, and others could see you as overly possessive and dependent.

Cancer's element is Water. Symbolic of the emotions, water signs need to give and receive. They thrive on the exchange of feelings. They need security and love to be wrapped in an environment of love and comfort. Truly a wonderful example of Yin receptivity, Cancer seems to absorb memories, feelings and psychic messages. Of course, they send back their own good vibes in the process. The cardinal' motivation energizes their strong ability to provide for others. Few work as hard and as tenaciously as Cancer. Without the balance of Yang assertiveness, however, Cancer's confidence can be a bit wobbly. After all, the Crab is so very sensitive to everything. Just as the sign's ruler, the Moon, goes through phases, Cancer often experiences mood-swings. Sometimes the desire to love, results in giving too much. In such cases, the Crab can become over-protective or dependent. Balanced, the Cancer adds personal independence to his or her priorities.
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Hmm... A lot of things to ponder about...

Posted by Isabelle at 6:19 pm